Things My Mother Taught Me

Many of you may know I was blessed with two more grandchildren last month – Boy/girl twins! And with Mother’s Day approaching I have spent the last few weeks considering “wise” words to include in this article about motherhood.

I contemplated things I learned from my own mother so that I could pass it along. I focused on my law practice where mothers are sometimes clients and sometimes on the opposite side of the dispute, but mothers uniformly have very strong opinions about their children. I always encourage my client mothers to be flexible, to learn to share their time with the kids, to be patient, tolerant and not to use children as pawns in the dispute. Most can put their children’s needs ahead of their own.

I would give credit to the author of the following Things my Mother Taught Me, but it’s been republished and revised so many times I cannot find an author. I suspect it is a compilation of multiple authors through the years. I did not write it but it brings back wonderful memories every time I read it and sometimes brings tears as well. Enjoy & Happy Mother’s Day!

My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”

My mother taught me RELIGION.
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”

My mother taught me LOGIC.
“Because I said so, that’s why.”

My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
“If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”

My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
“Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”

My mother taught me IRONY.
“Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about.”

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
“Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”

My mother taught me about STAMINA.
“You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”

My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
“Stop acting like your father!”

My mother taught me about ENVY.
“There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do.”

My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
“Just wait until we get home.”

My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
“You are going to get it when you get home!”

My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way.”

My mother taught me ESP.
“Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?”

My mother taught me HUMOR.
“When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”

My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
“If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”

My mother taught me GENETICS.
“You’re just like your father.”

My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
“Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”

My mother taught me WISDOM.
“When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.”

And my favorite:
My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
“One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you.”

2022-05-16T16:06:58+00:00